Reasons why Oregon is better than Michigan

So, I'm sitting in a hotel Starbucks in Grand Rapids, Michigan. Why am I in Michigan you may ask? To receive database training from the database creator of Good Works, the donor management program my organization uses. I know....fun AND exciting.

Anyway, I'm probably just grumpy because:
a. My coffee is still to hot to drink
b. I didn't get any sleep last night because my body rebelled against my trying to convince
it it was really 11:00 and time to go to sleep, and not 9:00 and time to cuddle and watch South Park with the husband and the kitty.
c. I burned my wrist on my hair straightener this morning, right on the spot where it rests
on my laptop when I type so each syllable is a painful act of will
d. I question the point in blogging because I haven't done so since October, meaning no one
most likely read this.
e. This blog editor doesn't do all the cool Microsoft automatic format editing I've come to
love so much, so I can't indent the way I want to and I keep hitting the tab key which annoyingly goes to the next link instead of doing what I want it to do.

All that aside, as I sit here this morning 5:00am Pacific time, waiting for my coffee to cool and preparing for a stimulating day of database discussions, I've decided that Oregon is better than Michigan. Indisputably.

Now for the reasons why.....

1. It's frikin' cold here! I mean really cold. The cold where it's snowing but not really and the flakes are super small becuase it's too cold for it to actually snow with the big soft flakes that I really like. It just makes everything gray and depressing. Not to mention that now that Christmas has passed, snow is just overrated anyway.

2. The yogurt sucks. I realize now how much I've taken Tillamook for granted. Wonderful...beautiful....smooth....delicioius Tillamook dairy products. What I wouldn't do for a slice of pepper jack...for a cup of the Cherry Vanilla Yogurt. My mouth is watering just typing about it. Instead, I'm stuck with this Dannon fruit on the bottom crap. It's completely flavorless and actually kind of gritty. It reminds me of the slop they dispense in the first Matrix movie where they have the discussion on how the robots could've known how to make things taste like. For the love of humanity, I hope they didn't make anything tast like Dannon Fruit on the bottom Strawberry yogurt.

3. Internet connection. In Portland, pretty much every coffee shop has free high speed wireless. Here...you have to go hunting....and then it's still not that great. I finally gave up on trying to go through my Outlook mailbox this morning because it was taking too long. I receive an ungodly amount of Spam email every day advertisting mostly Viagra and penis growth supplements (i know...lucky me), so I have to spend the first half hour of every morning sorting through my mailbox and deleting the 50-150 I've received overnight. Nothing's more embarassing than your computer freezing on an email with the word "cock" in it while you're sitting in a Starbucks hoping no one will notice your screen and praying that your co-workers don't come in to see what you're working on.

I'm sure there's more, but unfortunately, it's time to head out for the day. Can't wait to come home.